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Health & Fitness
March 2008
Let’s Talk about Sex
BN’s very own Health & Fitness Editor gives you the facts on sex health and fitness
By Jasmin Guleria
With all the books, web sites, and darling talk show hosts giving us tips on how to keep it hot, tasty, fresh, and healthy in the bedroom, it’s a fair assumption that some of us might be overwhelmed! Here are some simple must-do’s that only a fitness-savvy foodie fashionista could appreciate.
Fuel Up Dear Foodies:
nterestingly enough, the foods that are bad for your regular diet are bad for your sexual appetite as well! Avoid excessive sugar, salt, saturated fat, coffee, tobacco, and highly processed foods. This junk is linked to frigidity, difficulty reaching an orgasm and even, horrors of horrors, a lack of interest in sex!
To keep you at your peak sexual performance, ditch the burger at lunch and opt for a salad filled with grilled Alaskan Salmon, tomatoes, avocados, zucchini, and cauliflower. End your meal with a tangy-sweet orange. The veggies will keep your blood sugar level stable and thus happy and healthy for sex, while a citrus fruit such as the orange will do wonders for your sexual appetite! Also, salmon is a huge factor for sex because it is full of Essential Fatty Acids, which are crucial for the production of female sex hormones. You can also get your EFA’s from flaxseeds, fish oils, and primrose.
Aside from their inner sexual appetite, women are often curious about what to eat to make them taste and smell better in the nether regions. According to popular belief, the sweet and sugary pineapple is the #1 fruit that will keep your significant other eager to head south. But don’t take our word on it ladies, on your next date-night skip the after-dinner chocolate soufflé, pick up a bowl of this tropical delight, and see where the night takes you. Now that’s one dessert I could get used to!
Finally, just like our everyday health, taking vitamins is crucial for optimal sex health and enjoyment. 30 minutes before sex, pop in Vitamins E and B to help you get to the ever-coveted Big O.
Fitness-Mavens Rejoice:
Just like any other body part, your pelvic muscles need conditioning and strengthening exercises as well. Kegel Exercises will not only intensify and increase the number of your orgasms, but they also help get your PC muscles (the muscles around your pelvic bone) ready for birthing and help the uber painful process pass a bit more easily.
To find your PC muscles just remember the last time you had to wait to pee and clenched to hold it in. Those clenched muscles are your PC muscles, and clenching them is a kegel! Easy enough, no? Start off slow by seeing how many Kegels you can do before your muscles start to feel tired. Just like any other muscle, keep working on your endurance by increasing reps and sets. Experts say that if you can work up to 3 sets of 30 strong squeezes four times a week, you’re golden.
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Sexuality, Sex and health
Great sex, it's no secret
It's all about changing our ideas about sexuality and starting to feel empowered.
BY Donna Duggan | Jun 04, 2008
Sexuality is simply the way you experience and express yourself as a sexual being.
According to Jacqueline Hellyer, for centuries many women have been struggling with their sexuality: “We’ve had the Madonna/whore mentality for so long – where you should be one or the other – that it’s really left women feeling confused.”
To get a better understanding of Hellyer’s work, I attend her “Luscious Woman” full-day, women-only workshop. The event offers the opportunity to “unleash the awesome power of your female sexuality”, which sounds new age and confronting, but I’m willing to keep an open mind.
At 8.30am I line up for registration with the other women who have chosen to part with $400 for the workshop. I’m surprised by how gorgeous they are. Surely they have nothing to unleash?
The 14 women range in age from mid-20s to mid-50s.
“Helping people get in touch with their sexuality and seeing it in a really positive way is my main focus,” Hellyer says, as she eases us into the day. “Many of the sexual problems that women in modern society have stem from the fact that we have a very narrow view of what sex is all about, and it’s not a particularly good view.
“Sex is an intrinsic part of our being. It’s as natural as eating food. However, society tries to compartmentalise the experience, to judge it as good or bad. It’s left a lot of people confused. No one really knows what they should or shouldn’t be doing.
Additionally, there’s not a lot of good information out there about how to optimise your sexual experience. My goal is to give people that information so they can experience sex as something that is life-enhancing and very, very enjoyable.”
Our first topic is a history lesson. “Prior to the patrilineal civilisation we live in today,” Hellyer says, “women were more empowered and free in how they expressed themselves sexually. When man set out to conquer the world and establish a more male-dominated religion, things changed. It’s now up to us to swing the pendulum back a bit and reclaim that sense of empowerment we once felt about our bodies and our sexuality.”
Next, we move on to biology, real biology. We see diagrams of how female arousal mechanically works and how large the clitoris actually is. Through illustrations we see that penis size really doesn’t matter; it’s how a man uses it.
WHAT’S “NORMAL”?
“The challenge for me is the way sex is viewed by society,” Hellyer says. “Because of that view, people may avoid my type of work because they expect it to be about sex toys and Tantric sex techniques. Or they think they couldn’t possibly do something like that because they don’t feel good about sex or because it’s too confronting.”
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Sexual Health, for gays
Sexual Health
The information below addresses specific information about STDs/STIs (sexually transmitted diseases, sexually transmitted infections) other than HIV and syphilis that frequently affect gay men in Palm Springs. Some of the links include graphic images of potential symptoms and should be viewed with caution.
If you feel that you or someone you know my have been infected with any of the conditions detailed on this page, click here for testing sites.
Chlamydia
Chlamydia, which is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis, targets the cells of the mucous membranes including the surfaces of the urethra, as well as the anus or rectum. Chlamydia sometimes even affects the mouth or throat.
How it's spread:
Chlamydia is easily transmitted through semen, pre-seminal fluid and vaginal secretions during unprotected anal or oral sex with an infected person. It can also be transmitted by touching an infected area with your own genitals, anus or by sharing sex toys contaminated with infected fluids. Someone with no symptoms can still transmit it. Chlamydia is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.
Symptoms may include:
1. Discharge from the genitals, which may be yellow or white, watery or thick (see picture);
2. Need to urinate (pee) more often;
3. Thick yellow or white drip from the genitals
4. Burning or pain when you urinate (pee) or have a bowel movement;
5. Some may not experience any symptoms.
Treatment for Chlamydia:
A healthcare provider may prescribe a single-dose antibiotic, such as azithromycin (Zithromax), ta ken as a pill. On the other hand, the healthcare provider may choose an antibiotic, such as doxycycline (Atridox, Bio-Tab), to be ta ken as a pill twice a day for a week. Up to 95% of people will be cured after one course of antibiotics.
Prevention
Abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing Chlamydia, however if you choose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of condoms can effectively help reduce the risk of transmission.
Genital Herpes (HSV)
Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV) is a recurrent skin condition characterized by sores on the mouth or genitals. HSV-1 commonly causes “cold sores” or “fever blisters” on the mouth or face. HSV-2 is a closely related virus that is a much more serious infection causing painful sores on the genitals which can also be spread to the mouth or throat.
How it's spread:
HSV is primarily transmitted, both sexually and non-sexually, by direct contact with an active sore: mouth to genitals, genitals to genitals, mouth to anus or genitals to anus. It can also be transmitted when there are no active sores present as small amounts of the virus “sheds” onto the skin surface even when there is no active, visible sore. HSV is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.
Symptoms may include:
1. Small, painful blisters on the sex organs (see picture) or mouth (see picture);
2. Itching or burning before the blisters appear;
3. Blisters generally last 1-3 weeks. When they do go away, HSV is still present in the body. The blisters may reoccur in the same area with varying frequency;
4. An outbreak may be preceded by flu-like feelings.
Treatment for Genital Herpes:
There are medications available to treat genital herpes infections, preventing or reducing the frequency or recurrent outbreaks. However, herpes cannot be "cured." The decision to use one treatment over another for genital herpes depends on many factors that must be discussed with your healthcare provider. During an outbreak, keep the infected area as clean and dry as possible as this will help the natural healing processes. Some healthcare providers recommend warm showers in order to cleanse the infected area. Afterwards, towel dry gently, or dry the area with a hair dryer on a low or cool setting. To prevent chaffing, some people also find it helpful to avoid tight-fitting undergarments. Finally, a healthy immune system is important in controlling outbreaks of the virus. Don't ignore the need for proper nutrition, exercise, and rest.
Prevention
There is no inoculation for herpes so abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing HSV infection. However, if you chose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of latex barriers (condoms) can help reduce the risk of transmission. However, only areas covered by condoms, dams or gloves are protected from infection.
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Archived Articles, sex and health
It's the end of the year and it's the party season.. but how do you go out and have fun with your friends and still be safe? What dangers are there? Is there really anything to worry about?The end of the year can be a great time to relax and have some fun, get together with friends and all those leavers parties can be great- but what if not all goes to plan..
Stress
STRESS
"Not only do I have to worry about friends, family, school, relationships, should I- shouldn't I etc, etc, but to make things worse I don't know why I'm feeling so bad - I just can't cope with it all- I'm just.. just... STRESSIN' "
Stress can really change the way we think and the way we are feeling. There can be lots of reasons;
Sometimes its just because of changes in our body. Sometimes its a particular person or situation. Sometimes its lots of things- but rest assured you are normal. Everyone suffers stress from time to time.
A little stress can be a good thing because it helps us move forward in life - but if we have too much of it or in the wrong ways, then we feel like the wheels are falling off.
"So what can I do about it?"
Try not to make big decisions - making big decisions about relationships and other situations that profoundly affect our lives when we're under stress is rarely a good idea. We're not thinking straight and so are less likely to make the RIGHT decision.
Sort it out- Relationship problems are one of the biggest causes of stress and they rarely go away on their own. Deal
Do what you enjoy - we need time to ourselves regularly doing those things we love to help maintain a healthy chemical balance in the brain to help us deal with stressful situations.
Balance your life as much as you can - exercise, play, sleep, study, work, spend time with family and eat well. Often we get stressed because we are not spending enough time in one or more of these areas on top of life's little ups and downs.
Get some more exercise - Exercise increases the levels of our 'feel good' levels in the brain to give us a more positive outlook and in turn help us deal with stress
Talk about it - Friends are a great resource that can help when we need them. Open up and talk about it, its amazing how much talking can help. If not, talk to a counsellor, parent, youth worker or your GP. Someone a little removed from the situation.
"... I don't want to wake up pregnant. Or even worse with some disease- but is it really that likely to happen?"
"None of the guys I'm likely to sleep with, if I do, would have anything..would they?"
"Just a couple of drinks won't hurt"
"..They're only cordial with a bit of alcohol in them, nothing very strong.. all my friends will be drinking"
.... Sound familiar? These girls thought exactly the same thing...
Emily, 17: "I was at a party and there was this guy who kept going on an on about how he wanted to sleep with me. But he didn't have any condoms and neither did I, so I just told him it wasn't going to happen. Then I kept drinking and the next thing I know I wake up with him on top of me having a good time and I thought: You Prick!"
Alcohol and drugs are half the fun of going to a party. But it's important to know when you switch from "having fun" to "being out of it".
If you're too stoned or drunk to know what you are doing, you are putting yourself at risk...of having unsafe sex; of having sex when you didn't really want it or having sex when you definitely didn't want it, which is rape.
You could wake up with more than a hangover. You could wake up pregnant, with a sexually transmitted infection or just feeling rotten about yourself. It's not worth it.
* Do not stick with anyone if they're making you feel uncomfortable to pressuring you
* Say no at any time if you want to
* If you think you might end up having sex, take a condom
* Plan how you're going to get home. Don't just get into any car when it's time to leave. summer safe
*these suggestions come from an education kit called "Rethinking Drinking"
'Vodka nearly killed me'
After drinking a litre of vodka with her friends to celebrate the end of term, Anna started slipping into a coma.
It was nearly the end of term and, to celebrate, one of Anna's friends suggested they try to get drunk. "One of the boys looks older and he went to buy us alcohol", says Anna, 15. "I asked for an alcopop, but he brought back a litre bottle of vodka.
"I hated the taste, but I decided I'd drink the whole bottle - and that's exactly what I did. The others shared fizzy wine. I remember being sick, but I don't remember much more."
Around 10.30pm, Anna was found slumped outside the youth club. For 10 minutes, friends struggled to get her to open her eyes, without success.
An ambulance was called. The crew tried to rouse her and failed. It was 11.15pm. Her heart rate was dangerously low.
As Anna was rushed to East Surrey Hospital in Redhill, her mother Joanna received the terrible news: her daughter was unconscious. "I just froze," she says. "When I reached A&E, Anna was on a trolley with drips in her nose and a drain down her throat.
Call 000 if someone:
* Passes out and you can't wake them up
* Starts breathing slowly
* Turns blue, clammy or feels cold to the touch
* Starts choking on vomit
"The doctors opened her eyes and shone a torch into them, and her eyes had rolled right back. They asked me whether she took drugs, but I said 'no'," says Anna. "Funnily enough, I'd never worried about alcohol. She didn't even like the taste.
"The doctors managed to bring her round in A&E and they were pumping fluids into her. She had serious dehydration, but they got her to respond."
But at 3am, the monitors connected to Anna went crazy. Her heart rate had plummeted. Anna was going into a coma, so they started injecting her with drugs to revive her. She seemed to be slipping away.
"For nearly an hour, medical staff tried different drugs," says Joanna. "Luckily she stabilised again and the alarms went quiet. Her colour improved and she started breathing more deeply.
"Then at 5am, Anna suddenly sat up and said, 'Where am I? I need the loo!' She's vowed not to get drunk again. She's learnt her lesson."
"I can't even stand the smell of alcohol now," says Anna.
title
Relationships can be hard, and often things don't work out quite as we think they should. We blame ourselves, get sad and start to wonder if we can do anything right. But sometimes we get confused, because people are different, expect different things and we don't know who's right.
So here are a few things to ponder.....
A healthy relationship is based on respect.
It's when:
* you have fun together
* you both feel like you can be yourself
* you can have different opinions and interests
* you listen to each other
* you trust each other
* you can both compromise, say sorry, and talk arguments out
* you don't have to spend all of you spare time together - you can spend time on your own, or with your own friends and family.
"I really love and trust my boyfriend, he's like one of my best friends and I can tell him anything. He just wants us to have fun together, there's no pressure, and he doesn't make a big deal of it if I don't want to do what he wants. I can be myself with him" - Ana.
Jealousy - is this love?
"I thought our relationship was fantastic at first. But now things have started happening that I don't understand. He gets mad a me for wanting to be with my friends. And any time he sees me speaking to any other guy he accuses me of flirting. He says it's because he loves me."
Jealousy might seem like a sign of love. But when someone uses anger or jealousy to try to control what you do, or acts like they 'own' you, this isn't love - it's control. You've got every right to talk to anyone you want to.
What about Sex, am I ready? ..Should I feel Ready?
Having a good relationship doesn't mean you have to have sex. But whatever you do, whether it's kissing, touching or having sex, it should always be something that you both want to do.
Sex is meant to be:
* something you decide to do when you're ready to
* something that makes you both feel good
* something you can interrupt or stop at any time
* safe (because you're both prepared with condoms to protect you from sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancy)
Sex isn't meant to be:
* the only way to prove that you love someone
* something you feel pressured or forced into
* something you do because 'everyone else is doing it'
* something that makes you feel used.
Remember, if you've been kissing or touching but don't want to go any further, that's ok. Kissing is not a contract.
Trust and communication
The most important thing in a sexual relationship is that you trust the other person and you feel like you can communicate with them.
If you are considering a sexual relationship, or if you are in a sexual relationship, ask yourself:
* How much do I trust this person to respect what I do and don't want to do?
* How comfortable would I feel talking with them about safe sex and contraception?
* How comfortable would I feel saying no to them?
Someone who loves you should respect your right to decide if and when to have sex.
If you don't feel ready to have sex, you could say "I really like you but I don't feel ready to have sex yet".
Sex and Pressure
"I kept on pushing his hands away but he just put them back there, then I just froze, I couldn't say anything, it was horrible".
What if someone has touched you or made you touch them in a sexual way, and you felt like you had no choice?
You might have
* felt scared to say no
* felt pressured into having sex, because they made you think that if you didn't, they'd break up with you, or they wouldn't like you
* been asleep or drunk and didn't really know what was going on
* been forced into sexual contact
No-one should force you into any type of sexual contact. In fact, this is sexual assault, and it is a crime that can be reported to the police.
Remember, they have done the wrong thing, not you. It can help to talk to someone about it.
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CBS News: Health benefits of regular Sex?
Sex is not only a pleasurable thing but also has a wonderful health benefits. CBS News published a good article on the 10 health benefits of having regular intercourse. In modern stressful life, sex is a wonderful stress reliever.
10 health benefits of daily sex:
1. Decrease in blood pressure due to stress reduction.
2. Improvement in immunity due to release of antibodies.
3. It is a wonderful exercise.
4. It strengthens pelvic muscles.
5. Regular intercourse protects from heart diseases due to happy relations.
6. It improves one’s self confidence.
7. Daily intercourse improves relations between couple.
8. It reduces pain.
9. Sex reduces prostate cancer risk in men.
10. You can sleep better after good sex session.
Top 10 Reasons To Have Sex Tonight
(WebMD) When you're in the mood, it's a sure bet that the last thing on your mind is boosting your immune system or maintaining a healthy weight. Yet good sex offers those health benefits and more.
That's a surprise to many people, says Joy Davidson, PhD, a New York psychologist and sex therapist. "Of course, sex is everywhere in the media," she says. "But the idea that we are vital, sexual creatures is still looked at in some cases with disgust or in other cases a bit of embarrassment. So to really take a look at how our sexuality adds to our life and enhances our life and our health, both physical and psychological, is eye-opening for many people."
Sex does a body good in a number of ways, according to Davidson and other experts. The benefits aren't just anecdotal or hearsay -- each of these 10 health benefits of sex is backed by scientific scrutiny.
Among the benefits of healthy loving in a relationship:
1. Sex Relieves Stress
A big health benefit of sex is lower blood pressure and overall stress reduction, according to researchers from Scotland who reported their findings in the journal Biological Psychology. They studied 24 women and 22 men who kept records of their sexual activity. Then the researchers subjected them to stressful situations -- such as speaking in public and doing verbal arithmetic -- and noted their blood pressure response to stress.
Those who had intercourse had better responses to stress than those who engaged in other sexual behaviors or abstained.
Another study published in the same journal found that frequent intercourse was associated with lower diastolic blood pressure in cohabiting participants. Yet other research found a link between partner hugs and lower blood pressure in women.
2. Sex Boosts Immunity
Good sexual health may mean better physical health. Having sex once or twice a week has been linked with higher levels of an antibody called immunoglobulin A or IgA, which can protect you from getting colds and other infections. Scientists at Wilkes University in Wilkes-Barre, Pa., took samples of saliva, which contain IgA, from 112 college students who reported the frequency of sex they had.
Those in the "frequent" group -- once or twice a week -- had higher
levels of IgA than those in the other three groups -- who reported being abstinent, having sex less than once a week, or having it very often, three or more times weekly.
3. Sex Burns Calories
Thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. It may not sound like much, but it adds up: 42 half-hour sessions will burn 3,570 calories, more than enough to lose a pound. Doubling up, you could drop that pound in 21 hour-long sessions.
"Sex is a great mode of exercise," says Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles sexologist and president of the American Association of Sexuality Educators and Therapists. It takes work, from both a physical and psychological perspective, to do it well, she says.
4. Sex Improves Cardiovascular Health
While some older folks may worry that the efforts expended during sex could cause a stroke, that's not so, according to researchers from
England. In a study published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, scientists found frequency of sex was not associated with stroke in the 914 men they followed for 20 years.
And the heart health benefits of sex don't end there. The researchers also found that having sex twice or more a week reduced the risk of fatal heart attack by half for the men, compared with those who had sex less than once a month.
5. Sex Boosts Self-Esteem
Boosting self-esteem was one of 237 reasons people have sex, collected by University of Texas researchers and published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.
That finding makes sense to Gina Ogden, PhD, a sex therapist and marriage and family therapist in Cambridge, Mass., although she finds that those who already have self-esteem say they sometimes have sex to feel even better. "One of the reasons people say they have sex is to feel good about themselves," she tells WebMD. "Great sex begins with self-esteem, and it raises it. If the sex is loving, connected, and what you want, it raises it."
6. Sex Improves Intimacy
Having sex and orgasms increases levels of the hormone oxytocin, the
so-called love hormone, which helps us bond and build trust. Researchers from
the University of Pittsburgh and the University of North Carolina evaluated 59
premenopausal women before and after warm contact with their husbands and partners ending with hugs. Tey found that the more contact, the higher the oxytocin levels.
"Oxytocin allows us to feel the urge to nurture and to bond," Britton says.
Higher oxytocin has also been linked with a feeling of generosity. So if you're feeling suddenly more generous toward your partner than usual, credit the love hormone.
7. Sex Reduces Pain
As the hormone oxytocin surges, endorphins increase, and pain
declines. So if your headache, arthritis pain, or PMS symptoms seem to improve after sex, you can thank those higher oxytocin levels.
In a study published in the Bulletin of Experimental Biology and
Medicine, 48 volunteers who inhaled oxytocin vapor and then had their fingers pricked lowered their pain threshold by more than half.
8. Sex Reduces Prostate Cancer Risk
Frequent ejaculations, especially in 20-something men, may reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life, Australian researchers reported in the British Journal of Urology International. When they followed men diagnosed with prostate cancer and those without, they found no association of prostate cancer with the number of sexual partners as the men reached their 30s, 40s, and 50s.
But they found men who had five or more ejaculations weekly while in their 20s reduced their risk of getting prostate cancer later by a third.
Another study, reported in the Journal of the American Medical
Association, found that frequent ejaculations, 21 or more a month, were linked to lower prostate cancer risk in older men, as well, compared with less frequent ejaculations of four to seven monthly.
9. Sex Strengthens Pelvic Floor Muscles
For women, doing a few pelvic floor muscle exercises known as Kegels during sex offers a couple of benefits. You will enjoy more pleasure, and you'll also strengthen the area and help to minimize the risk of incontinence later in life.
To do a basic Kegel exercise, tighten the muscles of your pelvic floor, as if you're trying to stop the flow of urine. Count to three, then release.
10. Sex Helps You Sleep Better
The oxytocin released during orgasm also promotes sleep, according to research.
And getting enough sleep has been linked with a host of other good things, such as maintaining a healthy weight and blood pressure. Something to think about, especially if you've been wondering why your guy can be active one minute and snoring the next.
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